Moth menace

I've never been a great fan of any insects other than butterflies and ladybirds, and I also have a problem with spiders as long as they're not very tiny. It doesn't matter that I know they can't hurt me (in this country anyway) - rationality doesn't factor into it.

Then, last night, as I was sitting comfortably on the couch watching Gordon Ramsay yell at some poor sod whose restaurant was going to shit, I saw something moving up near the lamp, out of the corner of my eye. "It's probably nothing" I thought, as I turned my head and my eyes were confronted with the largest moth I've ever seen. I imagine it to have been the size of my fist, but I am most likely exaggerating. I almost froze up with fear, but had enough presence of mind to call for Boyfriend to come rescue me from the winged menace.

Thank goodness for Boyfriend. If I'd had to handle it on my own I'm almost positive I would've thrown up all over the place. Instead I hid bravely under the blanket whilst yelling "take it away, take it away!!".

After Boyfriend captured the fiend in a glass with a magazine over, there was a moment where you could very audibly hear it flapping it's wings inside the glass (involuntary spasms are going down my back as I recollect it). This is the part of the movie that would be made in slow motion, and with every flap of the wings of the moth it would sound like a thousand birds taking flight.


Boyfriend just let it out of the bedroom window and closed the curtain, which naturally left me somewhat apprehensive in regards to whether or not it would manage/want to find it's way back into our home. Thankfully it did not.

Moths are nice, Boyfriend said, they're like butterflies. But they're NOT! They're like the anti-butterfly! Yes, I know technically they are from the same family, but where butterflies are colourful, beautiful, delicate and fragile, moths are fat, hairy, hideously ugly, disgusting, flying lumps.

And I'm damn well going to make sure the curtain is drawn at night from now on!